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(HealthNewsDigest.com) – November 11th 2010 is Veteran’s Day and the holidays are right around the corner. You haven’t seen your soldier for a long while and you are feeling the blues. When will this all end? Why do you feel so anxious? Is it you or is it God sending you some sort of “sign?” You wake up anxious and go to bed lonely and depressed. Feeling depressed and anxious is common when we are separated from the one we love. Add to that the worry and concern of them being in a dangerous place and it is little wonder you are feeling blue. There are things you can do to help you dig deep during this time and feel better during the time of your loved one’s deployment.
1. Whenever possible communicate with your soldier. There are numerous ways you can do that with scheduled Skype visits, face book postings, care packages, and a group of family and friends. Many times you may not have heard from your loved one, but someone else in your inner circle has. Being able to share your soldier’s communications makes everyone feel less blue and more connected.
2. Use the time of deployment to get closer to your family and friends. Most of us schedule family and friends when we aren’t consumed with our own life. When you live with a soldier it is important that your life becomes your family and friends.
3. Schedule events that you find relaxing and fun into your daily calendar. It is important that you take care of yourself and can share with your soldier something fun you did while they were away. Many military people feel worried about being far away from their family. They cannot be there to reassure you or take you places. If you are able to do these things on your own, you will alleviate some of your soldier’s main concerns. This will make help him or her feel more confident in doing his or her job in a faraway place.
4. Get in touch with your spiritual side. There is strength in being able to sit quietly and listen to your inner thoughts. Many times God talks to us in our silence. Being able to pray and mediate will make you feel more connected to something bigger than yourself. This is important to help you feel that you are not alone.
5. Write your thoughts down every day. Journaling helps you understand what things make you feel more anxious and depressed. It is also a wonderful keepsake to share with your soldier when they get home.
6. Get involved with other soldier families. Join a military support group. Groups like www.militarywives.com or www.militarysignificantother.com are good places to start. Being able to go through an experience with others who understand and are in the same position helps us feel more connected. When our feelings are validated by others we feel more assured that we are not alone in our thoughts.
7. Movement makes us feel better, and relieves anxiety and depression. A walk twice a day, or a run can help you feel less overwhelmed. People think better and sleep better when they exercise.
8. If your depression lasts more than two weeks consistently, and you feel more and more alone, it’s time to tell your doctor. Your family doctor can point you in the right direction. Having to go on a medication for depression is not shameful or weak. It is a sign that you are educated and understand that you need help to get through this difficult time.
9. If you have children get them involved with activities at school, as well at home. Children love teaching other children about what their parent does in the military. Setting up an event at school to create care packages for military personal is something kids love to do. Children become enthusiastic if they have a goal to work toward. Painting a bedroom or fixing a room in the house while mom or dad is deployed can distract your child as well as build a sense of unity among your family.
10. Say your soldier’s name to someone every day. Keeping them in your thoughts on a present day level will help ease them back into your family when they return.
Having a loved one serve in the military can be such a source of pride and respect. Living without them on a day to day basis can be lonely and depressing. Being able to talk about what you are feeling with a friend or family member is the healthiest way to survive your soldier’s deployment. Taking care of yourself is the best thing you can do for your soldier while they are away. –Mary Jo Rapini
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